Friday, August 29, 2008

A Message from John McCain

Hey, you! Reagan Democrat over there! You're a woman, right? You look like a woman, but kids these days keep their hair pretty long ... heh, heh ... and I see freckles. Irish? You're Irish? Yeah, I bet you're a Catholic. And I must say that hair dye's keeping you youthful-looking.

Anyway, my pollsters tell me you're excited about voting for a member of your own generation. And you thought it was cool that a woman got so far in this year's Democratic primaries.

So I've got a deal for you: a woman on my ticket! And she's only 44!

What? What's that you say? She has no meaningful policy experience? Oh, come on. She was mayor of Wasilla. Wasilla has almost 8,500 people in it. It's bigger than the town YOU live in, isn't it? And she's been governor of Alaska since - uh - 2007. And she's only had one independent investigation launched against her so far!

But this is the great part -- she's pro-life! She's so pro-life she has FIVE children -- and the last one's only four months old! And he has Down syndrome! And she's going to make him a prop in a nationwide campaign, isn't that cool?? Her teenage daughters are bound to be psyched about all this, too, and her seven-year-old will love that big house on Observatory Circle.

I know you'll be as pleased as I am about my choice of the most qualified woman I could find to join me in this quest for the Presidency. Don't think about the fact that I'm 72; it's not as if Governor Palin would ever have to run things herself. She's just here to look pretty. Did I mention she was almost Miss Alaska?

15 comments:

Anna said...

She actually has responsibilities and DOES something as Governor, rather than Obama who just goes to hearings and votes (occasionally); she's willing to stand up to her own party on the corruption in Alaska; she's actually trying to actively DO SOMETHING about the oil crisis; she doesn't believe in killing babies; she's willing to get into politics and DO something rather than using the excuse that she has a young family, thus leaving it to someone else; and best of all, she got rid of the bridge to nowhere. At first glance, I'd say she looks ok to me!

Sounds like you could use a month with a bunch of theater people to get your mind off politics! Have fun!!

Moira said...

I am so insulted and I can only imagine how women like Carly Fiorino or Meg Whitman feel. I confess when I heard those choices floated, I was concerned. They are outside of politics women who broke through the glass ceiling and although I don't admire their politics, I do admire their accomplishments in corporate America.

As far as your previous commenter, yes, Palin is not leaving government "to someone else" but she is leaving being a mother to five children to someone else. Who is looking after her disabled child?!

People were horrified that a young mother of newborns was on Big Brother recently!? You don't think being a VP candidate is as time consuming as trying not to get voted out of the house.

AnswerGirl said...

Four years from now, I'd say "great." She's an interesting person with a compelling backstory. But her choice as vice president at this time is worse than random. I'd almost be happier if John McCain just went to his local Wal-Mart and grabbed one of the cashiers. It strikes me as cynical in the extreme, dismissive not only of women voters as a bloc but also of the office of Vice President. Maybe the Vice President really _isn't_ supposed to be anything but cheerleader-in-chief, but we're supposed to at least pretend it's more than that. And seriously: the man is 72 years old and has already had a couple of bouts of melanoma.

She will be scorched alive in the heat of a national campaign, and dragging her family along for this ride is reckless. While I'm all for working mothers -- and _no one_ has better pro-life credentials than I do -- taking any four-month-old baby out on a national campaign strikes me as downright irresponsible.

Moira said...

I wonder if she'll get equal pay? Something McCain has voted against his entire career.

Anonymous said...

Do you mean to tell me you think Obama is any better qualified than Governor Palin? Ridiculous. This is an inspiring and exciting development. She's bad ass and I can't wait to see her up against that blowhard Biden. Bring on the debates! I can't wait!

Susan

AnswerGirl said...

Absolutely I do. Yes, Barack Obama hasn't spent much time in Washington, but he's spent that time learning the big issues and working with other national-level decisionmakers. He's traveled the globe and met with world leaders. And, most significant of all, he has mobilized the most effective grassroots political movement this country has seen in my lifetime. It's impossible to overstate just how important that is and will be, when it comes time to lead this country.

Ed blogged the other day about how it doesn't matter much who the President of the United States is. To a certain extent, that's true; the government of the United States is a vast machine that runs more or less on its own, and the ability of the President to influence it is not as great as we'd all like to believe.

But the President does set the tone and the agenda. The President tells us what's important and what we, as a nation, should aspire to. I was looking forward to this election season, because I think that Obama and McCain have very different but equally legitimate ideas about this. So, for that matter, does Joe Biden.

Sarah Palin, by her own admission, is someone who got into national politics almost by accident, and has certainly not spent the last two years -- or even the last six months -- thinking about national policy. Now we're going to have 60 days to decide whether she's qualified to be a heartbeat away from the Presidency. That's ridiculous. That's an insult.

Anonymous said...

You don't think 60 days is enough? Don't be insulted. Be inspired. See what you think after the debates.

Susan

Ed Lamb said...

I'm with Clair on this one.

Picking Palin as a veep candidate is unfair to her and her family, insultingly pandersome to potential McCain voters, and dismissive of the office of the vice presidency. It's GHW Bush and Danny Quayle all over again.

Somebody should ask Palin to spell "potato."

Anonymous said...

Stop! I think she can do anything she pleases. For someone who believes in equal rights, I can't believe you are attacking her abilities as a parent and working woman.

Who took care of Chelsea when Bill and Hillary were breaking all the rules?

Just her a chance. She seems pretty tough. If she is Irish Catholic than she should be able to do anything.

Kathy

AnswerGirl said...

Where did I attack her abilities as a parent or as a working woman? She's probably a fine parent, and she seems to be a good Governor of Alaska. That does not mean that she is qualified to be Vice President -- or, God forbid, President -- of the United States.

Few people are, and it takes a while to prepare oneself for that job. I'm not qualified, you're not, most people aren't.

However, several people are, and John McCain insulted us all -- and did Governor Palin a disservice -- by not choosing one of them as his running mate.

It is true that any American can be President -- but not at a moment's notice, for Pete's sake! Or even 60 days' notice!

JIM LAMB said...

I finally love big brother! John McCain forever and a sharp stick in the eye for Hillary!! As for qualifications to be president, I am more qualified than any of the four of them to be president and the only living person I know smarter than I am is you Clair, unless it's one of your siblings.

The job doesn't pay enough for the hassels involved.

As for Obama, did he ride into Invesco Field on a donkey with palm leaves spread in front of him?

The best president of the 20th century was a nobody named H. S. Truman and the worst was Jimmy Carter who on paper looked very qualified.

Who knows, only time will tell and I can only hope that I'm here to see it.

Anonymous said...

I have three comments:
If the economy is so bad how can 84,000+ people make it to Denver for a Convention?

When Sarah Palin was announced, I felt a breath of fresh air come into my room.

McCain only has to live for 5 months for Palin to have as much experience as Obama in Washington.
Sally

Anonymous said...

...and who's taking care of Sen. Obama's children? Who takes care of any "important" man's children? Who brings that up?! So, as a woman, for the good of society I better not have children if I decide to run with the big boys in the career world. I am doomed to be a stay-at-home mom; or a working mother with a mediocre career at best so I can bring home the bacon and take care of my brood! Just for argument's sake; women are the best multi-taskers in the universe. I'm sure Governor Palin is intelligent enough to manage caretakers for her children & go to work. Maybe her husband will be Mr. Mom--maybe we should be asking what his qualifications are for that most important, prestigious position. One more thing; Gov. Palin kicks ass and she makes me proud to be a woman with children & a career.
Sara L.

AnswerGirl said...

Michelle Obama's mother looks after those girls after school, which I have no problem with at all. I don't have any problem with Sarah Palin having a career -- I don't have any problem with her being governor of Alaska!

I do object in the strongest, fiercest terms to the idea that women can have it all. They can't, at least not simultaneously. No one can. Something has to give. I am perfectly willing to applaud Sarah Palin's public ambitions, but why this year? Why subject her oldest daughter to this kind of scrutiny (I say, as someone who was in that position herself)? Why not have this special time with the child who is likely to be her last?

The more I learn about her, the more alarming I find her. She asked her local library to take books off the shelf. That alone disqualifies her from public office in the land of the First Amendment.

Archimedes Principle said...

I'm a Brit and really want to avoid the "it's not your election, so don't get involved" debate, and no doubt, there are cultural nuances that I just don't know about, but, I'm with Answer Girl here: this looks McCain's made an impulse buy at the checkout. Live-able if it was for the VP of a minor European country (like mine), but this is for the VP of the most important country in the world. Scary