“The only love that lasts is unrequited love.”

The Movie: Shadows and Fog, 1992 (Woody Allen, screenwriter and director)
Who says it: Lily Tomlin as a prostitute
The context: The prostitute comforts a female sword swallower (Mia Farrow), who has just walked in on her husband (John Malkovich) having an affair with the strongman’s wife (Madonna).
How to use it: Happy Valentine’s Day.

Ah, the one day a year calculated to make everyone feel truly lousy about the relationship they're in, the relationship they're not in, and the ideal relationship they COULD be in if only that relationship did not require the participation of another actual live human being. And it's only appropriate, because it commemorates the death of a martyr who supposedly died for performing Christian marriages.

No, I'm not bitter; I just really do think Valentine's Day is ridiculous, even for people who are in happy relationships. Who could possibly meet the expectations for such a holiday?

A million thanks to Tom Ehrenfeld for filling in so ably during the past week, and happy birthday to a few people I missed while I've been traveling: the fabulous Linda Brown, on (I think) February 9; lobbyist extraordinaire Buz Gorman, on the 10th; my oldest friend, Adrienne Lakadat, whose birthday was February 12; and my always-and-forever baby brother James, whose birthday was yesterday. And happy birthday today to Eileen Consey-Heywood, in the wilds of Yorkshire.

I'm on my way back to Maine today, and although I've had a lovely week in the sun, I will be very, very glad to get back to Dizzy. For Dizzy, every day is Valentine's Day.