Friday, January 16, 2009

I do not know how cold a witch's [fill in the blank] is.

I don't want to turn this blog into a weather report, but the cold does tend to preoccupy my thoughts. It was -13F when I got up this morning, and it's now warmed up to -3F.

As the saying goes, it's colder than a witch's whatever outside, except that I don't know how cold that is, and I'm not really willing to do the research necessary to find out.

Yes, the play I'm currently directing (Bell, Book & Candle) is all about witches, but the cast is acting, and as far as I know have no actual association with any local covens. In fact, one Gaslight board member suggested (tongue-in-cheek, I think) that we might try to get in touch with some local Wiccans just to make sure we weren't offending them -- and if we were offending them, we might encourage them to picket as a way of getting some free publicity.

Anyway, as I have discussed in a previous post, I have no reason to think that witches' body parts are any different from other human beings', in which case we can say that any temperature below 98.6F is colder than a witch's tit. Or nose. Or finger.

What I Read This Week

I did another manuscript cleanup this week, and continued to do a lot of rereading (which will go on for another week). But I did finish one very entertaining book:

Charlaine Harris, DEAD UNTIL DARK. I don't know why I hadn't read these books before, but my friend Matt and I had a "True Blood" mini-marathon when I was in New York last month, and it sent me back to the books. Sookie Stackhouse is a cocktail waitress with the power to read people's thoughts -- so when she meets Bill, part of the attraction is that she can't read his. The fact that he's a vampire makes things a little complicated, especially when someone in the small town of Bon Temps, LA starts killing off women who consort with vampires.


Anonymous said...

I once dated a witch. Anything below 98.6 F is colder than a witch's...

Well, pretty much every part except Suzie's hands.

Get A Life! said...

Several co-workers reported it was -20 this morning according to their car gauges and the local bank sign. I don't think the official temp was anywhere near that, but it was brutal. I'm noticing how much louder the jets flying overhead sound in this weather.

norby said...

My dad always says 'Colder 'n a welldigger's fart.'

No, I'm not sure how cold that is supposed to be either.